Can Ben Affleck save us from 'Armageddon'?

I just had to post this one, it's really funny! God I hated Armageddon so much, and that other one, what was it called, Deep Impact, that was terrible too. Stop throwing cheese at us and expecting us to swallow it!!!

But anyways, what if it came to fruition and an asteroid was going to hit us. We're f**ked, basically. Unless...

U.S. House of Representatives Passes Bill to Protect Us All From Asteroids

Gizmodo writes: Don't worry, folks: Our trusted representatives in government just saw the movie Armageddon, and they aren't going to take the threat posed by this mediocre 1998 action movie lying down. They're going to pass laws to make sure we're prepared to face any asteroid-related threat without having to send a bunch of oil drillers into space.

The House of Representatives just passed bill H.R. 6063, directing NASA to come up with plans for a cheap mission to send a craft to the Apophis asteroid to attach a tracking device. Apophis is on route to come closer


In addition to paying close attention to Apophis, the bill requires the Director of the White House's Office of Science and Technology Policy to come up with a policy for notifying Federal agencies and other emergency response groups of an impending near-Earth object threat. Hopefully they'll come up with better plans than whatever it is they have enacted for natural disasters now, because their track record doesn't really inspire confidence




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Moving.

Hey howdy, it's great to be back and blogging. I've been away for a week moving house, which was extremely tiring. In fact it was extremely stressful, as anyone who knows me knows that I'm very impulse, an impulse driven individual in fact. This influences everything I do and the home moving was no different. I made the decision to move on thurs afternoon and organised the move for that weekend, roping in 2 friends to help out. What great mates I've got!!!

Anyways, so instead of a week or whatever to get it all organised we had to to do it in a day. We did however manage to make it through and finally got it all sorted. Now we are finally settling into our new home and I can finally get back to the business of making music. Which reminds me, the Band!!!

I love making music, isn't it funny though, how different the worlds that musicians inhabit are from those of people who aren't musicians. I mean I can't imagine a world without music inhabiting vast majorities of my time, and understanding the rudimentaries of music is just something I take for granted. And yet I can't do my own tax return, isn't that amazing. For some people, doing maths is second nature. They might not understand music at all but they sure can plug advanced calculus. I always find this really fascinating. I had an acting teacher once who loved to meet everyday people with everyday, boring jobs. he found it fascinating to find out what they did because he worked with actors all day long. i guess it's the same for me, all my friends are musicians, and I always find it really interesting to talk to people who don't know about music. There's a thought for the day.

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Computers!

God I hate computers sometimes, they can be a musician's best and worst friend. I bought a brand new Acer note book from a notebook store and about a week later the webcam stops working and so do the USB ports. You can imagine how annoying this is, I couldn't update my Ipod! So I sent it off to Acer to get fixed under warranty, and they send it back 3 MONTHS later, with the same problems.
So then I get a lone machine off the notebook store while I send the original one back to Acer, who have now reported that computer is unfixable and is going to be replaced. HURRAY!!! Here's the part that pisses me off the most, the lone computer from the notebook store crashes, several times until it just won't start up anymore. So now I've had to reset it to factory settings, losing all the albums I downloaded off Itunes. GREAT!!

Lucky they were all on my Ipod, but still. I can't listen to em on my computer, and that sux! I'm just bitching I know, I'm still alive and healthy so I got that goin on, but if still, if I had been recording any demos which I was about to start doing, I would have been pissed!

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Session Musicians

Making it in the music industry is not easy, especially nowadays when the music industry is in such a state. Downloads are apparently killing off the record companies sales of physical cd's, and of course it's a sign of the times. I download a lot of music, and I don't expect people to I've got to want a physical copy of my cd's in favour of a downloaded copy. It's just so much easier. Plus there are so many avenues for musicians online these day, what do you really need a record company for anyways when you can do it all yourself.

the one thing that has stumped me though is finding the right band members. I've been looking for so long now that it's come to the stage where I have to admit that maybe there just isn't the right people I need out there. This doesn't mean that I'm giving up, oh no no no. What it does mean is that i'm stepping up to the plate, swallowing my pride and am going to get a session bassist. Maybe guitarist too. And whats wrong with that? I wrote, performed and recorded all the music, there was no band, just me. Maybe that's why there aren't that many bassists who are keen.

So I'm gonna start looking for a session bassist soon and get the ball rolling. Alot of very famous musicians use session musos, and though i'm not famous, I'm gonna add myself to that list. So onwards and upwards I say. Next, music videos.

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Let's all go to Army World!!!

By HOLLY M. SANDERS

IT'S A TOUGH SELL: Struggling to meet recruiting goals, the Army is turning to innovative marketing strategies to attract its next generation of soldiers.
PreviousPauseNext

June 15, 2008 -- We're going to Army World!

In August, the military plans to open its first Army Experience Center, a combination recruiting center/video arcade/retail store to promote serving your country.

Rumored to becoming to Times Square, it'll be like the Disney Store, except with guns and camouflage.

The 14,500-square-foot center will be a multimedia extrava ganza with high-tech gadgetry, including flight simulators and life-size soldier video games.

That person greeting you at the door? That's an actual Army of ficer.

While the Army will sell a small amount of merchandise at the venue, the focus is on building "brand experi ences" that give poten tial recruits a taste of military service.

Last summer, the Army appointed its first official chief marketing officer, Edward Walters, a 38-year-old West Point grad armed with an MBA and a marketing stint at Kraft Foods.

Walters said the Army store is a prototype for a new kind of recruitment office and is the latest example of the military's increasing use of marketing tools to attract the next generation of soldiers.

"We're moving away from normal recruiting offices and desks to places where men and women can experience military service," he said.

"We've been doing that with innovative techniques like interaction with real soldiers and high-tech virtual experiences."

The Army already holds elaborate marketing events around the country to entice potential recruits. For instance, mobile Army Strong Zones offer rock-climbing walls and weapons demonstrations. It also has started to use Facebook and MySpace, as well as online gaming and cellphone messages.

In 2006, the Army tapped ad agency McCann Erickson to craft a $200 million ad campaign with the "Army Strong" tagline.

"Traditional marketing has been challenging," Walters said. "When you're just focused on TV and the Web, it's hard to get the full message out there."

The Army barely exceeded its overall goal of adding 80,000 soldiers last year, and only after relaxing standards, such as allowing recruits who lacked high-school diplomas.

holly.sanders@nypost.com

A. says: I wanna go to Army world, and disney world and all the other world that will take my big, fat Australian dollar bills! Anyone been to Aussie world? Well as soon as they make it I suggest you get in line.


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s

New Music tips: Grab peoples attention, senses and emotions.

Grab people's attention, senses and emotions

Touch as many of their senses as you can
Never use corporate-speak
Leave 'em wanting more

The more senses you touch in someone, the more they'll remember you.

BEST: a live show, with you sweating right on top of someone, the PA system pounding their
chest, the smell of the smoky club, the flashing lights and live-in-person performance.
WORST: an email. a single web page. a review in a magazine with no photo.
(Let's say that “emotions” are one of the senses.)
Whenever possible, try to reach as many senses as possible. Have an amazing photo of yourself or
your band, and convince every reviewer to put that photo next to the review of your album.
Send videos with your presskit. Play live shows often. Understand the power of radio to make
people hear your music instead of just hearing about it.
Get onto any TV shows you can. Scent your album with patchouli oil. Make your songs and
productions truly emotional instead of merely catchy.
(Touching their emotions is like touching their body. If you do it, you'll be
remembered.)

Never use corporate-speak


Don't try to sound pro or use industry catch phrases.
Would you do that to a friend?
Your fans are your friends. Speak to them like real people.
Write every letter or email as if it were to a good friend. From you to your best friend Beth.
Even if it's going out to 10,000 people.

Leave 'em wanting more


What's more appealing?
Someone holding a carrot in front of your face, then pull it back towards them slowly?
Or someone shoving 50 carrots in your mouth?
Brian Eno (my favorite theorist) says the best thing you can do is to bring people to the point
where they start searching.
Not so plain or obvious that there's nothing left to the imagination. No so cryptic that they give
up.
Give people just enough to pull them in, but make them want more. Make them go searching for
clues, or details, or explanations, or “more of what you just gave me.”


Please share freely - Credit Derek Sivers - Link to sivers.org

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Legal or illegal, what's your preferance?

By DAMIEN CAVE
Published: June 14, 2008

MIAMI — From “Scarface” to “Miami Vice,” Florida’s drug problem has been portrayed as the story of a single narcotic: cocaine. But for Floridians, prescription drugs are increasingly a far more lethal habit.

An analysis of autopsies in 2007 released this week by the Florida Medical Examiners Commission found that the rate of deaths caused by prescription drugs was three times the rate of deaths caused by all illicit drugs combined.

Law enforcement officials said that the shift toward prescription-drug abuse, which began here about eight years ago, showed no sign of letting up and that the state must do more to control it.

“You have health care providers involved, you have doctor shoppers, and then there are crimes like robbing drug shipments,” said Jeff Beasley, a drug intelligence inspector for the Florida Department of Law Enforcement, which co-sponsored the study. “There is a multitude of ways to get these drugs, and that’s what makes things complicated.”

The report’s findings track with similar studies by the federal Drug Enforcement Administration, which has found that roughly seven million Americans are abusing prescription drugs. If accurate, that would be an increase of 80 percent in six years and more than the total abusing cocaine, heroin, hallucinogens, Ecstasy and inhalants.

The Florida report analyzed 168,900 deaths statewide. Cocaine, heroin and all methamphetamines caused 989 deaths, it found, while legal opioids — strong painkillers in brand-name drugs like Vicodin and OxyContin — caused 2,328.

Drugs with benzodiazepine, mainly depressants like Valium and Xanax, led to 743 deaths. Alcohol was the most commonly occurring drug, appearing in the bodies of 4,179 of the dead and judged the cause of death of 466 — fewer than cocaine (843) but more than methamphetamine (25) and marijuana (0).

The study also found that while the number of people who died with heroin in their bodies increased 14 percent in 2007, to 110, deaths related to the opioid oxycodone increased 36 percent, to 1,253.

Florida scrutinizes drug-related deaths more closely than do other states, and so there is little basis for comparison with them.

It has also witnessed several highly publicized cases in recent years that have highlighted the problem. Only last year, an accidental prescription drug overdose killed Anna Nicole Smith in Broward County.

Still, the state has lagged in enforcement. Thirty-eight other states have approved prescription drug monitoring programs that track sales. Florida lawmakers have repeatedly considered similar legislation, but privacy concerns have kept it from passing.

As a result, federal, state and local law enforcement officials say, Florida has become a source of prescription drugs that are illegally sold across the country.

“The monitoring plan is our priority effort, but that is not enough,” William H. Janes, the Florida director of drug control, said in a statement accompanying the study. He said Florida was also looking at ways to curb illegal Internet sales and to encourage doctors and pharmacists to identify potential abusers.

Some local police departments have taken a more novel approach.

In Broward County on May 31, deputies completed a “drug takeback” in which $5 Wal-Mart, CVS or Walgreens gift cards were distributed to 150 people who cleaned out their medicine cabinets and turned in unused drugs in an effort to keep them out of young people’s hands.

“The abuse has reached epidemic proportions,” said Lisa McElhaney, a sergeant in the pharmaceutical drug diversion unit of the Broward County Sheriff’s Office. “It’s just explosive.”

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CCP Eliminates all Pests!

Once again a mass slaughter of animals has been ordered in China. In addition to the human sacrifice due to forced labor, forced evictions, detention without trail and an increase in the repression of human rights which are taking place in order to present a happy and orderly façade to the world for the Olympics, cats are being killed as they have been deemed an impediment to a smooth Olympics!

The new ridiculous objective of the Chinese authorities is harmless felines. Their crime? Prowling the streets of Beijing during the Olympic preparations.

Why cats? – you may ask. They exist without express CCP authorization and embarrass the regime.

The number of these enemies of the people is about 200.000. Their existence compromises the exemplary image of efficiency and cleanliness that the regime has decided to project to the world in the occasion of the Olympic Games. This extermination plan dictates the deportation of the unlucky felines to filthy centers in Changping, outside Beijing. Then they are suppressed. These accusations were made by an animal protection association of Beijing, the "Capital Animal Welfare Association." It has lead to inspections, performed in order to ascertain the true living conditions of the cats, crammed into cages which are almost as small as the cats themselves.

What was really surprising about this entire fact is that it even reached the Western media, and that the members of this animal rights association have not suffered the same fate as the cats, which would be the standard operating procedure of the Chinese Communist regime – round up those considered to be "problems" to the regime, get rid of them, dispose of their bodies. Obviously all proposals formulated by the association in order to implement an alternative solution for the animals have been ignored, and the consequences that this elimination will unavoidably cause will be a proliferation of rats, which will then cause an even greater problem for the city.

Evidently the Chinese authorities unable to think of two things at the same time, probably because their brain circuits have been subjected to 60 years of Communist indoctrination. A similar event occurred in 2004, when the dogs and cats of Canton were exterminated, as they were considered vehicles of Sars. They were killed with blows to the head, while no one from the government explained to the Chinese population that perhaps certain eating habits (such as eating dogs, badgers, and raw monkey brains) may be more likely causes of serious damage to the immune system than Sars.

If we go further back in time, of course we have Mao Zedong’s disastrous 1957 campaign against the so-called "four pests campaign," specifically rats, mosquito, flies and… sparrows, which caused the locust population to increase, which significantly worsened the famine caused by the Great Leap Forward.

But it seems that learning from own’s mistakes is something unknown to the Chinese communist apparatus.

Later, during the Cultural Revolution, Mao declared a campaign against rats. A ransom was given to those who brought dead rats to the local authorities. The incredibly successful results of the campaign caused party functionaries to suspect that something was not quite right. They discovered that many peasants were breeding rats, then killing them and taking them to the local functionaries in order to receive the ransom. The campaign was then suspended, and some peasants were executed as traitors.

The failure of the campaign was accompanied by an ironic detail: "Mao" in Chinese, among its many meanings, means "cat": a cat unable to resolve the problem of rats.

The Solution: Boycott the Olympics - Boycott Chinese products



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Heavy pot smokers shrinking their brains

Australian researchers have found that long-term heavy use of marijuana may cause parts of the brain to shrink.

Published in this month's Archives of General Psychiatry, the study found that the hippocampus and amygdala were smaller in men who were heavy marijuana users compared to non-users.

The study looked at 15 men heavy marijuana users, who had smoked at least five marijuana cigarettes daily for on average of 20 years.

Brain scans showed that on average their hippocampus volume was 12% less and amygdala volume was 7% less than in the 16 men who were not marijuana users.

The hippocampus regulates memory and emotion, while the amygdala plays a critical role in fear and aggression.

"These findings challenge the widespread perception of cannabis as having limited or no harmful effects on (the) brain and behaviour," says Dr Murat Yucel of ORYGEN Research Centre and the University of Melbourne, who led the study.

The researchers also found heavy cannabis users earned lower scores than non-users in a verbal learning task - trying to recall a list of 15 words.
Psychotic disorders

The users were more likely to exhibit mild signs of psychotic disorders, but not enough to be formally diagnosed with any such disorder, the researchers say.

"Like with most things, some people will experience greater problems associated with cannabis use than others," Yucel says.

"Our findings suggest that everyone is vulnerable to potential changes in the brain, some memory problems and psychiatric symptoms if they use heavily enough and for long enough."

While about half of the marijuana users reported experiencing some form of paranoia and social withdrawal, only one of the non-users reported such symptoms, Yucel says.

The heavy marijuana users, average age 40, said they had used other illicit drugs less than 10 times.

The researchers acknowledged that the study's findings could not be completely attributed to marijuana use.

But Yucel says the findings certainly suggested marijuana was the cause.

He says the researchers have begun new research on the effects of short-term, long-term, moderate and heavy use of marijuana.

Will Dunham
Reuters

A. says: Hey man, drinking alcohol makes you lose braincells and we've been doing that for years, so why all the worry? Why not light up, switch on the TV and grab a bucket of popcorn. F**k it, it's only your brain, right?

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New Music Tips No. 7

More tips from the Derek Sivers book of how to sell your music. I think the first one is brilliant, make up your own genre of music defined by how you see yourself. So it's metal and country blended together, it must be Mountry!!! Or how bout Countel? Well ya can't say I didn't try.

If you target sharp enough, you will own your niche

Let's say you've decided that your style of music should be proudly called “powerpop”.
If you say, “We're powerpop!” in the very first sentence or paragraph all of your marketing.
If your email address is “powerpop@yahoo.com”
If your album title is “Powerpop Drip and Drop”
If the license plate on your band van is “POWRPOP”
Well then... when someone comes into my record store and says they like powerpop, guess who
I'm going to tell them to buy?
Have the confidence to find your niche, define who you are, then declare it again
and again and again and again.
If you do it persistently enough, you will OWN that niche. People will not be able to imagine that
niche without you.
(You can try to make your own, if you're brave. You might be “the best techno-opera artist in the
world”.)

Bad Targeting Example: progressive rocker targeting teenybopper.


On CD Baby, there is a great musician who made an amazing heavy-progressive-metal record.
When we had a “search keywords” section, asking for three artists he sounds like, he wrote, “britney
spears, ricky martin, jennifer lopez, backstreet boys, mp3, sex, free”
What the hell was he thinking? He just wanted to turn up in people's search engines, at any cost.
But for what? And who?
Did he really want a Britney Spears fan to get “tricked” into finding his dark-progressive-metal
record? Would that 13-year-old girl actually spend the 25 minutes to download his 10 minute
epic, “Confusing Mysteries of Hell”? If she did, would she buy his CD?
I suggested he instead have the confidence to target the REAL fans of his music.
He put three semi-obscure progressive artists into his search engine description instead, and
guess what?
He's selling more CDs than ever! He found his true fans.

sivers.org

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Get em wasted and close the deal!!!

Here's something funny, this guy smokes more weed than the average varsity first year, and I should know! Drugging people is obviously wrong though, so does he deserve to go down...I'm always very prudent when casting judgement about something like this, especially when it's based on only one article. It is funny in a very dark way though so that's why I posted it. Hope you like it:

June 5, 2008, 4:37 pm

New Tech Sales Tactic: Drugging Customers?

Ever think that your business’s tech chief must have been on drugs when he bought a particular piece of computer equipment? Turns out he may have been.
cocktail_art_160_20080605163649.jpg
Think twice before accepting a drink from a tech vendor

Henry Nicholas, the co-founder of Broadcom, which makes the chips that power all sorts of tech equipment, was indicted today on a litany of drug-related charges. Among them: Slipping ecstasy into the drinks of “technology executives and representatives who worked for Broadcom’s customers” without their knowledge. The indictment doesn’t say which customers Nicholas allegedly drugged, but it does mention one incident in New Orleans in early 2000. (The indictment, which you can read here, doesn’t allege that any customers or partners were tricked into business deals.)



The indictment alleges that Nicholas distributed ecstasy, cocaine and methamphetamine, that he hired prostitutes for himself and customers, and that he smoked so much pot on one private plane trip that the pilot had to put on an oxygen mask. (The Journal’s Law Blog has more details, including the news that Nicholas’s lawyers haven’t returned the Journal’s phone calls and that Nicholas checked into rehab in April.)

In the meantime, we’re left to wonder whether secretly drugging customers is a common sales tactic for tech companies. It would certainly explain why so many corporate tech projects fail — and give tech departments a handy excuse.

Ben Worthen

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New Music Tips no 6.

Well don't you just know it, another tip from the mind of Mr Sivers, and you thought it wasn't possible to make it as a musician. For shame!!!

Proudly exclude some people

Proudly say what you're NOT: “If you like Celine Dion, you'll hate us.” ...and people who hateCeline Dion will love you, or at least give you a chance.You can't please everyone in this world. Recklessly exclude people.Almost like you're the doorman at an exclusive club that plays only your music. Maybe youwouldn't let in anyone wearing a suit. Maybe you wouldn't let in anyone without a suit!But know who you are, and have the confidence that somewhere out there, there's alittle niche of people that would like your kind of music. They may only be 1% of thepopulation. But 1% of the world is 65 million people!Loudly leave out 99% of the world. When someone in your target 1% hears you excluding the partof the population they already feel alienated from, they'll be drawn to you.Write down a list of artists who you don't like, and whose fans probably wouldn't like you. Use that.

The Most Expensive Vodka

There is a vodka company that advertises itself as The Most Expensive Vodka You Can Buy.
I'll bet they're very successful with it. It's almost a dare. (And it proudly excludes people!)
Other companies are all trying to find ways to be the cheapest, and someone had the guts to
decide that they were going to do exactly the opposite of everyone else.
There are some people who read the Billboard charts, and try to imitate the current trends and
styles.
I suggest, even as an experiment, strongly declaring that you are something totally UN-trendy -
the opposite from what everyone else wants or is trying to be.
Perhaps you could advertise your live show as, “The most boring concert you'll ever see.”
Perhaps you want to call your music, “The most un-catchy, difficult to remember, un-danceable
music you've ever heard.”
Or tell the music industry, “This music has no hit potential whatsoever.”
I'll bet you get their attention.
It's almost a dare.

sivers.org

www.myspace.com/azumuthmusic

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A fun way to get ugly!

By Sarah-Belle Murphy, June 4, 2008

Take a look at this face? Does it look familiar? Perhaps it reminds you of a crazy great aunt or your drunken uncle in his finest fancy dress attire. Take another look.

If the shock campaign from the Drug and Alcohol Service for London has it way, you'll begin to see that the face could be your own, or at least very similar to how you would look if you carry on binge drinking.

Women, it seems, are more concerned about the impact alcohol has on their looks than they are about their health. A study carried out by the UK charity discovered that two out of five women worried about their looks and only a third about more serious wellbeing implications. And when it comes to piling on the pounds, alcohol's affects on looks were a greater worry than heart disease.

The new tactic to prevent alcohol abuse among young women is targeting vanity hard because, as alcohol service campaign spokesman, Harrinder Dhillon, says, "Women are clearly not reacting to health warnings and drinking among females is getting worse year on year."

While the issue of binge drinking in the UK may seem a world away, the problem is as rife here in Australia. Australian women are drinking more than ever before and it's not only adversely affecting their health.

Figures from the Australian Bureau of Crime Statistics show a rise of almost 10 percent in the number of women accused of involvement in assaults during the four years to 2007.

Weight gain: alcohol is packed with calories and will eventually show up on your waist.

Here's some food for thought if you're considering going on a bender this weekend...

Broken capilliaries: It's not only pensioners that suffer from ruddy complexions — drinking too much causes vessels in the face to expand and break, leaving ugly red veins.

Aging skin: drinking leads to dehydration as it stops the release of antidiruretic hormones so the kidneys get rid of too much water. As your skin dries out, it is more prone to wrinkling.

'Red eye': a night out can lead to bloodshot eyes the next morning but over time, these obvious blood vessels can break, leaving an unattractive perma-bleary look.

Bad odor: drinking too much leads to bad breath and body odour. Your liver can only work through one unit of alcohol per hour and the rest must be excreted elsewhere.

The message in the UK's shock campaign may be extreme, but the point is valid. Drinking too much will inevitably lead to health deterioration, which in turn will ruin our looks.

There's no need to cork that bottle of wine for good though — just drink in moderation. No one wants to wake up one day with a face like this, after all.

Note from A: Binging is fun!! Drink drink drink some more, it's only your looks, charm and personal hygiene that's at stake, not to mention your youth and vitality! I see lot's of withered up old people on the streets with a bottle of wine or meths under one arm, cigarette in the other, and they look perfectly happy. Sometimes they're so happy they fall asleep on the sidewalk, completely oblivious to the world and it's problems.
So have another drink, hell have several, then dpo some things you'd never do when you're sober; like hit on a girl, get into a fight with a bouncer, throw up and pass out in the gutter. Some people say that drinking let's down the walls of inhibition that we create for ourselves. And they're right, so let's get pissed!

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New music tips no 5

Another tip from the book of Derek Sivers, here we have two seperate tips that will help you get just that little bit further in your promo:

Read about new music. Use the tricks that worked on you.

Go get a music magazine that writes about new music.
You'll read about (and see pictures of) dozens of artists who you've never heard of before.
Out of that whole magazine, only one or two will really catch your attention.
WHY?
I don't have the answer. Only you do. Ask yourself why a certain headline or photo or article
caught your attention.
(Was it something about the opening sentence? Was it a curious tidbit about the background of
the singer? What was it exactly that intrigued you?)
Analyze that. Use that. Adapt those techniques to try writing a headline or article about your
music.

Have the confidence to target

If you don't say what you sound like, you won't make any fans
Proudly exclude some people
The Most Expensive Vodka
If you target sharp enough, you will own your niche
Bad Targeting Example: progressive rocker targetting teenybopper

If you don't say what you sound like, you won't make any fans

A person asks you, “What kind of music do you do?”
Musicians say, “All styles. Everything.”
That person then asks, “So who do you sound like?”
Musicians say, “Nobody. We're totally unique. Like nothing you've ever heard before.”
What does that person do?
Nothing.
They might make a vague promise to check you out sometime.
Then they walk on, and forget about you!
Why???
You didn't arouse their curiosity! You violated a HUGE rule of self-promotion! Bad
bad bad!
What if you had said, “It's 70's porno-funk music being played by men from Mars.”
Or... “This CD is a delicate little kiss on your earlobe from a pink-winged pixie.”
Or... “It's deep-dancing reggae that magically places palm trees and sand wherever it is played,
and grooves so deep it makes all non-dancers get drunk on imaginary island air, and dance in the
sand.”
Any one of these, and you've got their interest.
Get yourself a magic key phrase that describes what you sound like. Try out a few
different ones, until you see which one always gets the best reaction from strangers. Use it. Have
it ready at a moment's notice.
It doesn't have to narrow what you do at all. Any of those three examples I use above could sound
like anything.
And that's just the point - if you have a magic phrase that
describes your music in curious but vague terms, you
can make total strangers start wondering about you.
But whatever you do, stay away from the words “everything”,
“nothing”, “all styles”, and “totally unique”.
Say something!

sivers.org

www.myspace.com/azumuthmusic

www.revernation.com/azumuth

Myspace promotion 101 for bands

Myspace has been around for awhile, hell I had a myspace account when it first started up years ago but I never thought it was anything other than a way to meet people and keep in touch with friends. Little did I know of the power of myspace, especially for bands to find fans and network. It's the greatest thing since sliced bread! Below are some tips on how to get your myspace page happening if your a band.


Ironically, this initial step starts out offline. First, collect any promotional materials you've produced for the band. This can be anything from digital art used for flyers, band photos, music videos, member bios, and (most importantly) your tunes. The larger the pool of content you amass, the easier it should be to pull together a dynamic MySpace page with cohesive thematic ties.

Pictures
Look and learn: Women with accordions in front, dorky dudes in the back.
Look and learn: Women with accordions in front, dorky dudes in the back.

Band photos have been done a million different ways, and most of them are awful. The temptation to take those trademark "fake candids" or jokey Abbey Road remake shots is going to be strong. Don't do it. In the immortal words of David St. Hubbins, there's a fine line between stupid and clever. Play it straight or you'll likely end up looking awkwardly self-aware.

Ultimately, however, you want to get noticed. When you play a show, you want the club promoter or local newspaper to use your band's photo to illustrate the gig write-up. Also, when people go to your page, they are not going to add you as a friend if you look like a bunch of dorks.

Tip: Put your most attractive band member front and center.

Tip: If you have a quirky instrument in the band, hold it in the photo. Put the cellos, accordions and SynthAxe Drumitars in the picture, but leave the vintage guitars in their cases.

Tip: The brick wall line-up shot is a major no-no.

Tip: If time and money aren't an issue, schedule a consultation with a local professional photographer. Rest assured, the outcome will definitely look better than the picture you took in your bedroom rocking out with a point and shoot. Style, cost, and skill level vary drastically from one photographer to another, so shop around. Also, any photographer worth their weight in should be able to offer digital copies.

Music

As you hopefully already know, MySpace band pages are outfitted with a rudimentary music player. So, if you haven't converted your music to a digital format, now is the time. Be sure to rip your tracks in the best quality available, because the audio is bound to be compressed further down the road.

Video

Video shares a lot of rules with audio. You're going to want to convert any performance or promotional videos you've shot into a digital format. YouTube makes for an ideal hub for digital video, as its embeddable player is easy to incorporate into MySpace band pages.

Bios

Every band has a story, right? If you haven't already, take a moment during this collection phase to jot yours down. You might be building a graphically-driven page to market your music, but potential fans will probably want to know details like members' names and background info. Oh, and most importantly -- proofread, proofread, proofread.

Events

Myspace has a way for Bands to list events and upcoming shows which is nice. The interface is a little 1999, however. For maximum exposure make sure to get your Events listed on Upcoming which will distribute your events all over Yahoo! including Local, Search and Yahoo! Music. Keep an eye on the watching/going numbers and link back to your "Buy Tickets links to round out the experience.

Step 2: Window Shop for a Page Layout

I know, I know -- you've probably already got some bitchin' layout with glitter and flames planned in your head. But it can't hurt to look around. Cruising through other bands' MySpace pages can be extremely helpful when it comes to finding inspiration. Look at it this way -- even if you don't see anything you love, you're bound to find dozens of layouts you absolutely hate. Working backwards, you can probably formulate a clear idea of what you're looking for. Paired with the inventory you took in the previous step, you should have a rough idea of the pieces in play and how to bring them all together. If time and artistic inclination are in your favor, you might even want to sketch out a rough mockup for later reference. Above all else, remember that you're creating a promotional springboard for your band -- so, if you've chosen a layout that's generally bloated, confusing, or hard to navigate, head back to the drawing board.

Step 3: Setup a Core Base of Friends

One really is the loneliest number. Now that you've got your profile up and full of goodies, it's time to add friends. No one likes to admit it, but the easiest way to a befriended band page is to hit up your personal friends. It makes everyone feel a little dirty, but it's relatively painless and easy to build a skeleton crew. Ping your friends via direct messages, comments, or even bulletins that the band page is up. Most people (worth calling friends) will humor you, befriend the band, and give your uploaded songs a few courtesy plays.

Tip: Hit the local scene first. Bands tend to stick together on a regional basis. Just make sure any unsolicited friendship requests include a brief note introducing your band and asking for their support.

Tip: Play nice. Self-promotion through inter-band beefs comes much later in the game, so just focus on working all your amicable social networks until you get things off the ground.

Step 4: Update Often
Let your Myspace friends know about awesome show moments like this one.
Let your Myspace friends know about awesome show moments like this one.

Even if you're in this for purely promotional reasons, you have to remember that MySpace is about being social. Keep things fresh with a weekly blog post, FYI bulletins for general band news, and a concert calendar. Mixing things up in terms of the music available on the page can help too. Although it's tempting to upload as much of your catalog as possible, it might prove advantageous to release tracks in smaller bunches. Keep the content moving. Regularly swapping out profile pictures and backgrounds is great way to recapture attention.

Tip: If the band is going through a slow period in terms of performances, you can still broadcast other shows or events that the band may be attending. Passing the torch like this is helpful for fellow bands, and it allows you to remind fans that you exist -- even when you're not performing.

Tip: Don't get spammy. Once your flood of content becomes overwhelming, people are bound to stop listening. Make sure that all your updates are relevant, punchy, and consistent with the personality of the band.

Step 5: Branch Out

With the fundamentals in place, you should be ready to start marketing your band page actively on the site. One of the best places to look for potential fans is the pages of similar bands. Sure, you might think your anti-indie noise-pop band is one of a kind, but chances are there's another one on MySpace that appeals to the same crowd. The ideal way to capitalize on this is either befriending the other band and working out some cross-promotional agreement (tricky), or just pop up onto their page every once in a while with a comment or tasteful plug (much easier). If this doesn't fly with the page owners, you can always approach their friends individually with a non-spammy invitation to visit your band's page. Given the unpredictability of a person's musical taste, it may take a while to reach critical mass. But take solace in fact that the numbers are in your favor -- the more times you put your band's page out there, the more likely you are to net some visits.

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